The thing that will kill the Internet!

Do alt.religion.kibology:

I have invented the thing that will make the Internet obsolete! A year from now, people will say "The Internet" and you'll say "What's that?" because you won't remember because you will be using this thing instead. It's dead, it's kaput, it's wrongthink! The Web? Amateur hour! Idiocy! It's a bunch of words with underlines! Usenet? Usenet? It ought to have been put out of its misery in 1990! Ridiculous! It's a bunch of words with no underlines! Where's the interest? Where's the buzz? Where's the heat? E-mail? Half the time it's got a virus in it! Won't anybody think of the children? Instead you will use this thing! It's scalable, it's converged, it's synergetic, it's synergistic, it's all media rolled into a better thing than any one of them! It's like Ginger only without the plastic balls that pop up and down! It's like Java only with a Quake interface. We're going to leverage that knowledge, that instinct for how people interact with computers, but, more importantly, with other people. The Internet isolates us; this will bring us together at long last. Goodbye to bowling alone! It will rework the way we build cities and cut our hair! It's the next big thing! It's the next little thing! It does 3D in a hologram-like way. It's already inside of you! What I have in mind... It's completely modular, object-oriented. It's a solution built for Extreme Programming from the ground up. It's better than the Web because it is fully interactive. It's nothing like TV because it puts you in the picture! It's going to educate our children! The Internet is anathema to good business models; we're going to do it right! Dot-com gone dot-bomb? Not this time because there's no com. There's no dot!

BOW DOWN BEFORE MY PRESS RELEASE!

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Matt McIrvin

Postado por caio em agosto 12, 2001 9:08 AM